Monday 11 February 2013

Map 561 Focus on The Good


Focus on the Good

My Grandfather was a wise man beyond his years and brought my Mother up on phrases like “return evil by doing good”. My Mother considered this to mean that if someone did you harm, intentional or accidental, pay them a kindness in return, don't let them get you down. It didn't always go down well as people saw it as her trying to come out on top. Needless to say she brought us up with that same motto and a few more of her own. For example if anyone is gossiping just answer, yes, I and no and that way you don't offend them but you are not joining in. I misunderstood and would literally reply yes, I and no to every piece of gossip I heard much to the irritation of the person gossiping because as they rightly said, it makes no sense. Years later I told my Mother I wasn't having much joy with her yes, I and no statement and she explained that she meant I should use the words in reply such as, “oh yes”, or “I see” or “I know”. I think she could have been clearer.

As life progresses I realise my Grandfather could also have been clearer because what I think he meant was if someone does you harm and makes you feel bad and down. Go out and do something good in the world and I promise you it will lift you and make you feel better, the person you have helped feels better and the world is a better place despite the original act of cruelty. It does not have to be the person who harmed you that you help it can be anyone. If you can't think of anyone to help pop into town unfortunately there are many people on our streets who could use some help. Bake scones, buy bottled water, just have a chat. The help you give is your choice but in helping someone else the truth is you are really helping yourself out of that black hole your problems have placed you in.

If you find it difficult to reach out just take a look through your wardrobe and if you haven't worn something in a while give it to the charity shop. Look through your bookcase, this one is a favourite of mine, and any books you wont read again pop in a smile card and leave it on a park bench or in a hospital waiting room. We all have something we could give away and not notice it's gone. The crazy thing is that what started out as you feeling unloved or unhappy has now turned into something beneficial to the rest of the world.

So next time you have a problem with someone that cuts deep, don't ruminate on it or give them any of your time. Just move on by busying yourself with your own good deeds. I guarantee you will feel better. You don't need to be given thanks for your goods deeds, only you need even know about them. You will get a warm feeling inside knowing you have done good. Focus only on being good, no matter how large or small your deed is so long as its good you are changing the world for the better and yourself.

Warning do gooding can be addictive but will never damage your health.

Enjoy your journey. x

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